Dating Girl: Are Dating Apps Killing Romance?

Jul 9th 2014 4 Comments

dating girl

by @KimberleeVDW

I’ve shared my reviews of dating apps before for Dating Girl, most being negative experiences. But with more and more people owning smartphones, that seems to be the new wave of dating. I’m worried it’s not all good. It’s bad enough people stare at their phones while walking the streets or worse while you’re at dinner with them trying to have a conversation.

Now we’re becoming too lazy to put the work into romance. 

More and more GPS-enabled apps are popping up: TinderMeetMoi (recently acquired by Match) and Grindr for starters. It seems like information about the potential match is no longer required and now photos and “how far are they from me?” are the new standard. Most of these apps only leave a small space for a description, which is rarely filled out. Dating sites like Match and OkCupid have their own apps where you can access the user’s profile but people still use it in the same manner as another app (i.e. swiping through photos).

Most of these apps, led by the phenomena Grindr, are used for casual sex (hey, good for you!). However, if you’re not looking for that (like myself), then what options are available to you? I’ve been using an app, Hinge, for the past few months which is supposed to search your Facebook friend’s single friends for matches.

However, even that provides little information and once matched guys are lazy about messaging. 

In a recent article in Psychology Today, therapist Ken Page says that all these apps have “created a lot more micro-jerkiness in early-stage dating than there has ever been before.” Oh good… I thought it was just me.

My experience with dating apps is that it has completely killed the romance factor.

Once matched guys just want to meet up in a casual way that implies they have something else on the brain (i.e. texting you at 1am “you up?”).

What say you? Do you think these type of apps are killing romance? What’s been your experience? 
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Check out more from DATING GIRL & her adventures in New York City.

Kimberlee blogs about her love of fashion and beauty at I Have A Degree In This!. She’s lived in Midtown Manhattan for 8 years and has tried it all when it comes to dating. 
image: wehearit

4 Comments to “Dating Girl: Are Dating Apps Killing Romance?”

  1. I have had some success with online dating and I’ve written about It on my site, but I have also delt with the frustrations of these sites being more like a hook-up finder. I even recently had a guy check his dating app while on a date with me, which was a strong sign that we are not a match.

    I’ve given up and gone back to these sites several times because what is the alternative in an urban city like San francisco where everyone is a work-a-holic and too lazy to meet others the old fashion way? i think you’re article touches on a very interesting topic that people are not thinking about.

    • Kimberlee says:

      Thanks Danielle. Yeah I go back to Dating Sites on and off because I live in NYC which has a similar issue. I just wish there was perhaps an app that encouraged conversation more.

  2. LoudPen says:

    Yes dating apps are very interesting. In some ways they make dating easier as far as actually meeting people. but they do take the romance out of meeting people because there’s no mystery because you’ve seen their pics and read their life story on their profile. then people put on a front like using old photos or worse photos that aren’t even them. I do like technology b/c I am a blogger and work full time in social media and I have a start up that does social media/online marketing. But I miss the old school ways of meeting people and just having good conversation. can someone tell me #wheretheydothatat?! Lol

    • Kimberlee says:

      haha I don’t think that exists anymore.

      I like certain sites because yes you get full details but these apps are all about pics and quick hook ups. you get basically no info about the person so you’re supposed to message but the guys never do unless it’s to hook up!

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