ME: “Hey, I remember you! How is everything?”
Driver: “Hi! Great, everything is good.”
ME: “How is the wife? And kids, right?”
Driver: “They’re doing well, even in these tough times. What about you?”
ME: “Pretty good, just visiting mom again!”
Driver: “By yourself, huh? You’re not married?”
ME: “No. I’m still working on getting a boyfriend.” how sad!
Driver: “You’re so cute, you’re not seeing anyone?”
ME: “Well, yes I was seeing someone for almost 2 months and it just ended recently.”
Driver: “What happened?”
ME: “Well, I basically asked him what he was looking for from me, bc I’m not interested in ‘casual’ dating. I thought we were on the same page bc we spoke about what each of us was looking for. But when things changed and he stopped calling as much and contacting me as often as he would before, I wanted to know what was going on exactly. So, I figured, instead of dragging this non-exisitant dateship any longer, I’m just gonna ask him what the deal was.”
Driver: “How long were you guys seeing each other before you asked him this?”
ME: “About 7 weeks.”
Driver: “Wow, that’s so soon!”
It is? Oh, yea…maybe I should have waited 6 months and then see what was up? Uhm, F-that!
ME: “Well, he wasnt giving me attention. I’m not interested in pursuing someone who isn’t giving me the same time I would give them.”
Driver: “Whenever my wife is chasing me I start to pull away. But then when she doesn’t give me attention, I’m like ‘babe what’s going on’.” and telling me this is supposed to help me how? WTF.
ME: “Well, I dont need tons of attention, I’m talking about regular basic stuff like making plans to meet up on a consistant basis – like once a week, that’s not pyscho.” pffft.
Driver: “Guys are so simple. We don’t want much. We want sex. And when a woman closes her legs then we will run after them.”
Gah-ross, he seriously said this to me! I was in shock, uhm tooo much info cabbie guy, no thanks!
ME: “It’s not even that. I should have realized something was up with him when I asked him about the last chick he dated. She was a few yrs older than him and had a kid. I told him ‘that was great that he was open-minded’ and he says ‘actually it’s not that I was, I just never dated someone who had a kid, so I figured why not give it a shot’. So I ask him, ‘ok, well how long did you guys date then?’ He says ‘about 2 1/2 months’. 2 1/2 months?? What the hell took soo long to figure out that he didn’t want to see this woman anymore. So he was ‘testing out the waters’ or something. See what I mean? If I didn’t call him out on his acting non-chalant, he would have done the same to me!”
Driver: “Yea it sounds like he doesn’t know what he is looking for.”
Exactly. Like flavor of the month. Ugh – I’m still irritated by douchy SF. I’m sure I won’t pay any mind after I start dating someone new, but right now, I’m still annoyed by his B.S. FF!
SF was 33 and single for over 3 years – at this point, shouldn’t you know what you want and if you don’t want anything serious bc “you’re too busy and don’t have time”, then be honest & upfront about it before I have to ask you – hello! Games do not go over well with me.
Driver: “Well, I still don’t understand why you’re single. You’re too cute!” says cabbie before I give him his tip…what a pro!
Ok, so no more talk of SF. I just had to add this cabbie convo since him saying “guys are simple” brought back fond blog comment memories and “Act like a Lady, Think Like a Man” excerpts ;->
p.s. Tonight’s SATC rerun was the one where Miranda gorged on chocolate cake bc she decided to take a hiatus from dating. Chocolate ganache cupcakes – here I come! LOL.
xoxo,
MG
“Thought I’d try dating a woman with a kid”? UM, did he have a to do list? One with kid, one with no legs, one with male genitalia, sounds like a very immature guy! You are much better off! The cab driver should start his own advice column, he could call it “Dear Cabby” lol!
Sometimes you just don’t get it, do you? You’re too needy, you’re scaring men off. That’s what the cab driver was trying to tell you but you were too busy taking offense to realize that.
You need to repeat this to yourself : THE PERSON WHO WANTS THE MOST OUT OF THE RELATIONSHIP HAS THE LEAST AMOUNT OF CONTROL.
And one more thing, no matter what you think, if you’re asking “What do you think about me” or “What do you feel about me” then you’re unequivocally, no doubt whatsoever, the person who wants the most out of the relationship.
That, Midtown Girl, is why you haven’t had a successful relationship last longer than two months.
Oh that’s so funny that you got the same one you had a while ago! For some reason, it seems like cab drivers always have some kind of insight on things. Anyways, I hope you’re having a nice time with your mom!
P.S. About the comment above me… they shouldn’t have been rude. But I agree with them in that it is as simple as that usually: “The person who wants the most out of the relationship has the least amount of control.” Distance always makes them wants to fill in the space, just as it did for you. But iv’e read all of your posts in the past and you are NOT one of those annoying, extremely needy girls. It’s totally understandable that you want to define the relationship because you’re looking for something serious. But I mean.. who knows? Maybe if you just let go and see where it goes it would be greater than trying to define things or contacting him more than he does you and it would last longer and build stronger.
Otin – exactly – everyone has their 2 cents right? I wasnt even asking him for advice, he was asking me why I wasnt with someone! next time I'll just keep my mouth shut and talk about the weather, LOL!
ParkAvePrincess – thank you for understanding that I am NOT that type of chick. I'm actually very simple when it comes to what I want – someone fun & caring who is looking for the same things I am. Not complicated! I appreciate your advice ;->
To "Anonymous": the issue is not being needy. I do not chase or bother whomever I date, I usually let them contact me to make plans or whatever it is and never pressure anyone into anything. The first 3 weeks this guy was telling me how busy I must be b/c I hardly called/texted him.
I have never asked a guy 'what was he was feeling' or 'what did he think' before, bc most guys I have dated would tell ME what they thought without me asking. This last guy was the exception, which is why he confused me. The first few dates he had asked ME "what I was looking for". So, I was confused as to why things changed after some time, when I thought we had been on the same page, since he said he was looking for "Mrs. Fanatico".
The issue is SEX. Which is obviously where the relationship will eventually be headed, if you are dating someone for sometime. I'm not asking for a proposal/marriage, I was simply stating that I prefer to be in a committed, monogamous relationship with someone before anything intimate were to happen. If this scares off a guy I am dating, then they are not the one for me to begin with, obviously. I'm not going to sacrifice my morals bc someone doesn't want to be solely dating me at the time and still want to be intimate – hell no! I really don't think that is too much to ask. And if it is, they can move on, which is fine by me.
p.s. – why no name 'anonymous'…what are YOU afraid of?
GET ’em girl!!! I love your blog!!!
Anonymous is a chicken! lol
P.S. I tagged you at my blog!
Otin the super hottie? are you on drugs LMAO!! I like the name though, haha!
Personally… I’ve read ALL your dates… and even Back-logged or is it back blogged lol?, your blog to read before I met you and NO you are not needy, or desperate, or any of the likes. 2 months is an investment. AND he acted like he was all for more especially with the rides to and from his place etc. etc. Was he just after sex? Probably I’m guessing now, which is pathetic in itself, but, a NEEDY girl would have given it up and even TEXTED TEXTED him away instead of deleting his number to prevent those “needy girl tendancies” all us girls have. Maybe anonymous is one of your past FF! LMAO!
Sigh.
I’m sorry you took that personally, I really was trying to help. No one else was going to tell you so I thought I should. Park Avenue Princess, good friend that she is, tried to tell you the same thing in a softer, friendlier way – maybe you will listen to her.
Nevertheless, like I said, you really just don’t get it and you probably never will. Men want what they can’t have and you made yourself readily available, so available in fact that you were basically asking for a solid commitment by the second date.
I have been a dedicated reader for a while because I sympathized with you but now, because you have taken offense to my comment (just like I knew you would) AND made more excuses for your pathetic behavior, I certainly won’t be back.
Good luck finding a man through your online endeavors, you’re definitely going to need it 🙂
Oh NYC cab drivers are really a riot.
Charlotte sounds like some butch bitch that couldn’t attract a fly if she was made of shit! Why is she reading about your personal life anyway? Why is she so determined to try to make you see her point? Why can’t she just read for the humor in the male female battle that has been going on forever? She should just put on her strap on and diddle her mans anus and shut the fuck up!
lol lol lol go otin.
OH EM GEE!!! That is WHY I love Otin! lol