Comments on: Keeping Strong Friendships While in a Relationship…?

By: Jonathan

Jonathan — Tue, 09 Mar 2010 23:58:06 +0000

Coming from a male perspective I have to say the same thing happens here – especially if she's a keeper!

However, I have a philosophy on relationships which is.. DO NOT and I repeat, DO NOT lose your identity in your primary relationship. It's what we were initially attracted to in the first place right? Maintain who you which include your friends and then build a new part of yourself with your partner together.

In other words, it's all about balance

By: Allie

Allie — Fri, 05 Mar 2010 19:16:01 +0000

Hopefully things will get back to normal as Wendy said. We all know guys and girls that become totally consumed with their significant others. I like to call it "I Love You Man" syndrome; have you seen the movie?

I hope she snaps out of it. I have a good gf that's doing the exact thing.

By: Shop N' Chomp

Shop N' Chomp — Fri, 05 Mar 2010 17:01:08 +0000

I think this happens to almost every girl. =\ Like Wendy said, things will get back to normal.

By: freeteyme

freeteyme — Fri, 05 Mar 2010 16:45:48 +0000

Arrgghhhhh I turned into one of those girls now! I will catch up.. i will keep in touch… calling galpals now!!!!

By: Chic 'n Cheap Living

Chic 'n Cheap Living — Fri, 05 Mar 2010 16:26:46 +0000

I never wanted (and try not to be) one of those friends. There are the ebbs and flows in a relationship though and though she may spend a lot of time with him now, that may change when they establish themselves more and she enables herself to have more time with others.
It is hard though and if you tell her how you feel, hopefully she'll make sure you get your time too (sometimes she may not realize it until you say it!)

By: Diana

Diana — Fri, 05 Mar 2010 04:31:07 +0000

When I got married, this happened a lot. I felt really guilty for it and would even argue about it with my husband. Then I became aware that everyone has different seasons of their life they are going through. RIght now, your friend is building a relationship with a man she man one day marry or not. Right now, you are in the season of your life where you are single and ready to mingle (lol). One day, you'll be in the relationship trying to juggle so much, and this is where friendships are tested, with growth.
I really really appreciated my friends being supportive but I didn't take them for granted. I would even run errands with them just to see them or even go out for coffee for an hour or two so I can see them.
I hope that helps! Hang in there!

By: Jessica

Jessica — Fri, 05 Mar 2010 00:06:27 +0000

Try to talk to her. I've definately been in this situation before and it SUCKS! Try to make definate plans with her. Like say Sunday brunch. Set a specific time and place and just talk with her about how you feel.

By: Ice Queen

Ice Queen — Thu, 04 Mar 2010 23:46:26 +0000

I've pretty much had this problem with girls my entire life. I'm not sure if there's anyway to avoid it and personally I think that's messed up of your friend to do.

(Stop by my place and pick up an award I have for you)

By: blueviolet

blueviolet — Thu, 04 Mar 2010 22:45:51 +0000

It's always really intense like that in the beginning. Eventually it will lessen somewhat, and she'll have more time for you. But right now, it is what it is.

By: Ali

Ali — Thu, 04 Mar 2010 22:44:31 +0000

I am in THE exact situation you speak of, girl! I think a lot of us single gals are, and it sucks. I vow never to become that girl, especially because I've been (and am!) on this end of it and it just blows and isn't fair.

Have you tried talking to her about it? You never know, she may be very receptive to what you have to say.